The Sounds of Pain

I stood uncertain, feeling the eyes against my back as he asked me to undress. I was scared and insecure, but my hands kept moving, sliding my shirt off of my body, unclasping my bra, dropping my pants. My heart pounded with humiliating delight as I stood in the center of the room for everyone to see and for everyone to judge. It was a lot smaller than I expected, but even so the fear was just as big.

The hemp slid against my chest with ease. My senses were alive and I felt the anticipation crawling through my body, screaming for more. The only sounds I could hear over the sound of the music was the beat of screaming. It wasn't a joyous scream nor was it a terrified one, but one that rests somewhere in between. She was afraid, but she wanted more. I envied her. I felt her screams inside of me, calling to me in all the right places.

The rope tightened around my chest and consumed my legs. Soon I was in the air, hanging from the ceiling by a few strands of rope. I spun, around and around and back and forth under I wasn't sure which way I was facing. I felt the rope slide against my skin, caressing me in a touch too intimate for words. I felt hands and heard the screams escalate into terror and uncertainty. I caught glimpses of the electric wand the man in black used to tantalize her to ecstasy. The screams turned to insults and indignant cries as a blindfold was wrapped tightly around my eyes. Everything went black. The insecurity melted away and for the first time in a long time I felt exhilarated, calm, and content with myself. There is something profoundly powerful in surrendering your will to another.

Around and around in circles I went. Hands touched me everywhere, exploring, confusing, disorienting. I didn't know where I was or where the owner of the hands stood at any given moment. At first I followed the screaming for a sense of stability and direction. Eventually the screams grew constant and any sense of direction I once had faded into blackness.

I don't know how long I was suspended, but it was erotic, sensual, vaguely sickening, disorienting, and wonderful. I think however incidental the person may be, there is something shared between a dom and his or her sub. There is some primal force that calls to one another, sensing the presence of the other before a scene has started.

I couldn't help but smile at the woman screaming "Why are you smiling you asshole?!"

With the blindfold removed he untied me little by little. My body felt unstable and shaky on the ground, but soon readjusted. I love the way the rope burns a little as its being loosened from the ties that bind. There I stood, nearly naked with eyes watching and people playing all around me as the strangest part of the night came upon me. His piercing eyes caught mine and he said very seriously, "thank you."

Thank me? What did I do? I want to know what he gets out of it and why I should be thanked.

It was an amazing suspension and a fantastic first visit. I can only hope that there are many more to come in the near future, and hopefully a lot more pain. ;)